I GOT DRUNK

My eyes are like flies in the wind
My brain is like a stain on the wall
Cuz when you’re not here
It’s like having a beer
Without any alcohol

My head is like smoke in the clouds
My heart is like a neck in a noose
Cuz when you’re not here
It’s like being in fear
Of finishing my bottle of booze

(Chorus)
I got drunk
Man I paid the price
I got drunk
Not once but twice
I got drunk
For the rest of my life
I got drunk
And it didn’t even feel good

My mind is like a hat full of tricks
My body is like it’s trapped in a chicks
Cuz when you’re not here
I feel real queer
Like drinking vodka coolers with mix

EARLY MORNING TORQUE

In my dreams at night
While I hold you tight
Urges come over me
In my sleep
Your body feels so wet
As mine begins to sweat
Are we in ecstasy
Or is it pee

(Chorus)
I’m waking up to report
I have an early morning torque
Get on your knees and be a sport
Cuz my time is running short
I’m waking up to report
I have an early morning torque
So with a cheer we’ll pop the cork
Of my early morning torque

In my sleep at night
While I hold you tight
Feelings come over me
In my dreams
My palms seem to be drenched
From the dream I dreamt
Was it my fantasy
Or did I leak

THE WORD OF THE DAY

As I’m heading down the street
To the liquor store for a drink
You walk by and glance my way
You’re in luck cuz I just got paid
How about we start heading back
To my place for a nightcap
You & Jack and me & my Crown
To the Church of The Bottle Brown

As the darkness slowly creeps
And the liquor starts to speak
Cripes almighty I will pray

(Chorus)
The word of the day is legs
And the word of the night
Well it only seems right
The word of the day is legs
And the word of the night
Is to spread the word of the day

How about a ménage a trois
Monday night right after Raw
You and I in my bed we’ll lie
With the Captain by our side
Dirty Mothers all around
White Russians on the ground
There’s no need to pretend
This party will ever end

As the daylight starts to break
The next day when it’s too late
Who in the Sam hill did I lay

THE FINGER

Going home to see my lady
Says she has some pretty bad news
It was only lust
It didn’t mean that much
She messed around with another dude

Then in the heat of the conversation
There was only one thing that I could do
In a single motion I made the gesture
Babe here it comes
The finger

She came home later that evening
Caught me bed with one of her friends
It was only lust
It didn’t mean that much
It’s an eye for an eye a tooth for a tooth

Then in the heat of the conversation
There was only one thing that I could do
In a single motion I made the gesture
Babe here it comes
The finger

Then in a moment of hesitation
My finger did something
I thought it would never do
And with a smile a wink and a wiggle
It made her come…
Back to me